Homily: The Importance of Community

[00:00:02] Good morning. Welcome to our guest today. It's a great blessing to have you welcome. This week I had a great conversation with a priest friend of mine. I think he's been a priest for about maybe 40 years. He's a priest in Wichita, Kansas. Father Dominic, great guy. And we were kind of sharing back and forth some of our seminary stories, going back and forth. And he was telling

[00:00:31] me back in the day when he was ordained, I didn't know this, before a guy was able to do a baptism on a real baby, they had him practice with a doll, like a baby doll that a little girl would have. And so he felt instead of, you know, I kind of felt foolish a little bit as a guy practicing on a baby,

[00:00:54] on a baby doll. So apparently he went to go baptize this doll. And when he poured water on the head of this baby, the head came off. And he said, Ben, it was just kind of awkward because the head was bobbing up and down on the water. And I said, well, I said, Father, if that doll was not holy before,

[00:01:14] it is now. I mean, Lord knows. But he said, you know, isn't it true, Father, that life does not go according to plan? Come to find out, his seminary instructor did that as a practical joke for him, anyway. But it's true, yeah. Have you ever heard the expression, you want to make God laugh? Tell him

[00:01:39] your plans. Life does not go according to plan, ever. Right? We have to pivot, we have to adapt with what drops in our lap. This is why I would argue that we need community support. We need the support of other people, introverts, extroverts, everything in between. We all need support. And it's usually the

[00:02:04] people that think they don't need it, that actually need it the most. I'm fine. I'm fine. Right? Really? Are you? Are you fine? We all need the beauty of community. We totally do. Absolutely. You know, during the Great Depression in this country, 1930s, there was an expression that often was going around. They had these Hoovervilles in different parks, right? Especially Central Park. And

[00:02:31] they had an expression that they often said during the Great Depression. It went like this. They said, just because somebody is born on third base, doesn't mean that he or she hit a triple. Just because they're born on third base doesn't mean they hit a triple. What does that mean? It means just because somebody is born into a situation, a family where everything is provided

[00:02:55] for them doesn't mean that they actually earned it. Doesn't mean they have a work ethic, and it does not mean that they are part of a community. And the point that they were making is that all of us need the help of other people, right? Or as the Beatles say, we get by with a little help from our friends. Isn't that true, right? Very much so. One of my favorite authors, M. Scott Peck, he says this.

[00:03:24] He wrote the book, The Road Less Traveled. And this is what he says. He says, there can be no vulnerability without risk and no community without vulnerability. There could be no vulnerability without taking a risk and no community without vulnerability. And his point is simply to say, look, if we're going to grow as a human being, spiritually and emotionally, we got to take a risk.

[00:03:50] We got to put ourselves out there. And that's scary for a lot of people. Do you know that half, statistically, half of Americans admit that they often struggle with loneliness? Between 40 and 60 percent of Americans admit they struggle with loneliness. That's a lot of people,

[00:04:10] man. Imagine half the church here struggles with loneliness. Wow. That's like a lot of people. But it's also true as they say, people can be alone and not feel lonely. And other people can be in a room full of people and feel lonely. I travel all the time by myself. I never feel lonely. I just go up to cafes and restaurants and I'll start talking to people.

[00:04:38] And I'm like, oh my God, this guy's crazy. Right? But I like the challenge of starting conversations with people. So you never want to sit next to Father Ben on an airplane, trust me. But a lot of times people, they can be in a room full of people and feel lonely. This is why we need community. We need community to grow spiritually and emotionally. We totally do. All of us.

[00:05:04] Do you know that in our very origins, we were in community? Second chapter of Genesis, we're told that God creates woman from the side of man. That's not by chance. God easily could have created a woman in the same way he created a man. I mean, I'm guessing he remembered the recipe on how to make a man. He could have done that, but he creates woman from the side of man to underscore

[00:05:32] that they are equal but different and they need each other. That's why Adam, when he sees the woman, he says, at last, this one is bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh. Right? That we are made for community. We are made for other people. It's worth pointing out as a side note, 300 years before Jesus was ever born, Plato and Aristotle said the exact same thing. They said, if you're going to grow

[00:05:58] as a person, you need other people. All of us. St. Paul says this in 1 Corinthians 12 too. We need other people. Do you know that here in this parish, we have over 30 ministries? 30 ministries. Isn't that amazing? So people may know this, but they may not know what those ministries are. Father Ben, will you tell us what they are? I absolutely will tell you what they are.

[00:06:27] Yes. Thank you for asking. In case you didn't know this, permit me just a few minutes to run through some of the ministries that we have in this parish. Number one, our patio nights. We have our cocktails and conversations, which we had this week. Ladies, I'm sure you know we had well over 100 women here this week for that. It was awesome just to be with them. Our burnt offerings, gentlemen.

[00:06:54] Great. It's so much fun. Look, 90% of those nights is just getting to know people. That's all. We throw a little Jesus at them. Okay? That's just getting to know people. Right? That's all we're doing. Our youth group. I would say that in my opinion, our youth group is so awesome. We have

[00:07:17] perhaps one of the most racially diverse youth groups in the city. No question. No question. I recently got back from the Steubenville conference to do awesome work. We have our young adult group. Do you know that every Friday, we have well over 30 young adults from age 18 to 30 that come together. So they go from the youth group to the young adult group. We have our group called the St. Mike's

[00:07:44] Men's. Gentlemen, if I can speak to you brothers as a guy and less as a priest, I think most of the men here would agree that it's usually hard for men to lead prayer. It's often really kind of awkward for us. It's like being the first dude on a dance floor. Right? And so a lot of guys are just not comfortable with this. Okay? So St. Mike's Men is an awesome group of men, just guys. We get together and pray and

[00:08:12] they do service work in the community too. Our Knights of Columbus are incredible too. They do so much for our community. It's awesome. Did you know that here at St. Michael's Church, we have a full-time licensed bilingual counselor to meet with our parishioners free of charge? Full-time licensed bilingual counselor that can meet if you have family issues, marital issues, life issues. Take

[00:08:41] advantage of that. It's free. Do you know that we also have a full-time bilingual addictions specialist counselor? Free. No charge. St. Vincent de Paul, several times a month we give out food for the poor. That's why people leave food at the doors. So this is, we're impacting the community outside of

[00:09:09] this parish. Do you know that we have a group called St. Mike's Serves? It goes into the community and does service projects for the community. Women of the Word. We have our different groups of women that come together and they kind of unpack and dig into the Word of God, getting ready for the Sunday Mass. Very powerful. Silver Social. We have a group called the Silver Social. Some of our senior

[00:09:38] parishioners that get together for talks. We also go out in the community at museums in different places as well. Bread alone. Have you done the cooking class with us? We're doing that this Tuesday night. We've been doing this for over six years, okay? We get together, we cook for about an hour and a half, and then we eat together for an hour and a half. That way they get to know each other. They may not remember each other's name. You know, they're like, oh, that's the guy that messed up that cake that he was

[00:10:07] decorating, right? Selfishly, I get FaceTime with these people that I may not otherwise get. So you're welcome to come. By the way, we do this in English and Spanish too. Souls for Service. Here at St. Mike's, we have the largest special needs community in the entire diocese. The last Sunday of next month, we will have this Mass. It will be the special needs Mass.

[00:10:32] They'll do the readings. They'll do sign language. They'll take up the collections, right? I always tell them they can preach for me too as well if they want. But they do everything. We also have a group for their parents, a group that's often forgotten about in English and in Spanish. We have pickleball and prayer, if you like pickleball. We're starting a new group in the coming months.

[00:10:59] It's called Adam and Evening's Out. Adam and Evening's Out. It's a time that couples that have been married for a while can come together with newly married couples or thinking about it and have time together. By the way, raise your hand, raise your hand if you've been married more than 10 years. Okay. Raise your hand if you've been married more than 20 years.

[00:11:27] Mm-hmm. Okay. 40 years? Wow. 50? Uh-huh. Raise your hand if you're not married and you want to be married. Okay. All right. That's not me. All right. Just so you know, that ain't me. Our newest ministry, St. Mike's Dating Service, right? No, I'm kidding. I'm kidding. Right? All right. So those of you that have been married for a while, I mean, correct me if I'm wrong,

[00:11:54] says the celibate man, but you remember those days? Your first few years of marriage? That's not, that can be a rocky time. Am I right? I mean, you're trying to navigate this new world, the bank accounts and the in-laws and that whole thing. It can be a rocky time. So that's what we're doing with this Adam and Evening's Out. That they're not hearing from the guy with the collar

[00:12:22] on how to navigate some of these waters. They're hearing from you. Imagine that. We have what's called The Nest. The Nest is specifically for younger couples to help them navigate these waters. We're starting a group next year after the first year. It's called The Fun Group, an acronym, Friends United as Neighbors. And The Fun Group, six times a year, what we're doing

[00:12:52] is we're going off property to do something, well, fun. Okay? Last time we went kayaking, we had about 30 people went kayaking. We'll go ziplining, we'll do picnics, microbreweries. And you say, why are we doing this? This will come as a shocker for people, but often,

[00:13:16] sometimes in families and couples, they forget to, well, have fun. They're really, really good at hitting all the details they got to hit every week, but they forget to kind of let their hair down. Okay? So we'd love to have you. We will be having, finally, our adult faith formation classes. Did you

[00:13:40] know in English alone, just English, we have over eight Bible studies here at St. Mike's? It's just English. I will be teaching a class in October here in the parish on angels and demons, getting ready for Halloween. And so we do this to help us in our mind and our heart, that we learn our faith,

[00:14:04] pray our faith, live our faith. Yeah. Here's my point, brothers and sisters. Look, if you want to grow to the next level emotionally and spiritually, we can't do it alone, whether we're introverts or extroverts. The back of the church, we got signups for any of the ministries that I mentioned, so I'll close with this. One of the reasons that we need community is that you and I can grow in

[00:14:33] sympathy, empathy, and compassion for other people. Let me give you an example. Let's say tomorrow at work, your coworker comes up to you and their dog just died. And you're talking to them. How would that person interpret it if they told you their dog just died

[00:14:57] and you were happy and cheerful? They feel like, wow, I don't really care. Or let's assume that tomorrow a coworker comes up to you and says, and they're crying, and they told you they just had a miscarriage in their marriage. And you say, oh, you know what? We had a miscarriage years ago. You'll be fine. You'll be fine. That may be true that you experienced a miscarriage and you had that

[00:15:26] pain. Is that what they need to hear? No. What do they need to hear? Tell me how you're doing. Tell me how you're doing. It's not about us. It's about them. But here's the thing, and this is why I'm telling you this. When someone is cocooned emotionally and spiritually, they're not thinking in those ways, usually. They're thinking in terms of the Holy Trinity of me, myself, and I. But when they have

[00:15:55] community support, the attention goes off of them to the other person. And when it goes to the other person, guess who benefits? Guess who benefits? They do and we do. We all need it.